The day that changed your life

“October 2, 1996. The day it all changed. The day I started never to take anything for granted. The day I learned to take charge of my life. It was the day I was diagnosed with cancer.”

“The day I was diagnosed with cancer was the day I started to live.”
- Lance Armstrong

Please take a second to read the rest of this quick post and come back, ok?

Done?

Do you have a day?  Was it cancer?  Divorce?  Loss?  Rehab?

Emptiness.

Ultimately, it boils down to emptiness.

Having absolutely nothing.

My moment was giving in to the depression.  Not that I was giving up.  Just the opposite.  It was the day that I came to Jesus with nothing.  I surrendered.  I spoke out loud what I knew since childhood (but had to live through pain to understand) that I had nothing to offer.  I needed help.  I was weak – He was strong. 

And I sat in that moment.

I sat in emptiness.

In the book (that I can’t seem to get off my mind) author, Ruth Haley Barton, says “all of us most walk through [emptiness] on the way to encounter God.”

“Most of us spend our whole life trying to avoid the experience of being empty and alone.  True solitude allows none of the usual escapes [from emptiness]“

Mr. Armstrong says the day he started living was the day he found out he was empty.

So if you find yourself there today, look for the Holy around you.  You may just have a life changing day – today!

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Invitations to Solitude in my Un-Silent World

In Retreat Reflections I began sharing a bit about this book:

Invitations to Solitude and Silence by Ruth Haley Barton. 

During my quiet times at the serene picturesque retreat I observed my setting:

The sun glistens on the water in front of me as the birds sing their song behind my head.  I can hear the wind dancing through the trees before it stops to cool my body.

It’s hard to be still and not have an agenda.  My heart presses for more knowledge of God – to read more – to learn more – to do more.  Yet my head knows I need to stay still and allow God to direct me.

Out of the corner of my eye I see the swans appear in the bay.  I wonder if they are as annoyed as I am at the jet skier which breaks the serenity of my moment.  My eye follows the graceful movements of the swans and I notice an apprentice.  One not quite as big and not quite as white.  But the apprentice follows the example set out before him.  And as he grows, he will continue to reflect the image of his father.

What a sweet lesson in this serene moment.  I wish I had my camera!

2 Corinthians 3:18: And we, who with unveiled faces all reflect the Lord’s glory, are being transformed into his likeness with ever-increasing glory, which comes from the Lord, who is the Spirit.

After reading more of my journal I came across this quote near the end of the book:

“Solitude does not consist only in creating perfect conditions outside myself… [but I noticed] the quietness of solitude and silence was becoming an inner condition within which I was to recognize and respond to the stirring, the voice, the very Presence of God himself.”

An inner condition.

ooo… I think I need more practice!

Often we think of solitude and silence in perfect settings, the best conditions, somewhere far away from here.

But in the author encourages us to practice times of quiet where ever we find ourselves and for whatever time we have.  The author talks about struggling to make it just 10 minutes.  Can you give up a few minutes just to sit and breathe to seek the Presence of God?  Knowing that it will cultivate an “inner condition” in which I can find solitude in my un-silent world – Yes – I will strive to create a daily practice.

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Retreat Reflections

I love retreats!  I could become a retreat junkie!  Here’s my favorite quote from the week:

You are like a jar of river water all shaken up.  What you need to do is sit still long enough that the sediment can settle and the water can become clear.  ~Invitation to Solitude and Silence, Ruth Haley Barton

Invitation to Solitude and Silence is an excellent book on learning the art of spiritual retreats.

The quote above was told to the author to help her understand the need for solitude.  When I first read the quote I thought this illustration is perfect!  We are all like shaken river water.  Even the good stuff gets cloudy from the confusion and murky water. 

Sitting still allows things to settle in their appropriate place.  It allows you to identify the places filled with mud.  Stillness opens your spiritual ears and quiets your busy mind.

I look forward to telling you more next week.  For today enjoy this look on the psalms and depression.  I agree with Peter, Psalms brings me comfort.

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