There is a balm in Gilead
To make the wounded whole;
There is a balm in Gilead
To heal the sin-sick soul.

Sometimes I feel discouraged,
And think my work’s in vain,
But then the Holy Spirit
Revives my soul again.

There is a balm in Gilead
To make the wounded whole;
There is a balm in Gilead
To heal the sin-sick soul

Although I can not find where scripture speaks specifically of Jesus being a balm for our soul, certainly it is implied. Titus 3 (The Message) says,

It wasn’t so long ago that we ourselves were stupid and stubborn, dupes of sin, ordered every which way by our glands, going around with a chip on our shoulder, hated and hating back. But when God, our kind and loving Savior God, stepped in, he saved us from all that. It was all his doing; we had nothing to do with it. He gave us a good bath, and we came out of it new people, washed inside and out by the Holy Spirit. Our Savior Jesus poured out new life so generously. God’s gift has restored our relationship with him and given us back our lives. And there’s more life to come—an eternity of life! You can count on this.

Jesus is the remedy. Even when we were engrossed in our sin, in our own ways, He came and cured us.

I told my bible study this week that I started 2010 thinking “this is the year of Shane!” I lost 30 lbs, ran a half marathon, earned new fitness credentials… all in hopes of finding, or redefining, ME. Unfortunately in this pursuit I left behind my Creator, the One who ultimately defines me. I found pleasures that filled my needs but ignored the gentle callings of my true love.

In order to get my attention God allowed several personal near catastrophes to take place. In a sense, He stripped open my “year of Shane” and exposed it for all the hurt, pain, fear it really represented. Why?

It’s all about remedy.

While reading the book, “A Shepherd Looks at Psalm 23″ this paragraph stopped me in my tracks.

“Wool in Scripture speaks of the self-life, self-will, self-assertion, self-pride. God has to get below this and do a deep work in our wills to right the wrongs which are often bothering us beneath the surface. So often we put on a fine front and brave, bold exterior when really deep down below there needs to be some remedy applied.”

I didn’t want a remedy. I wanted to live my pleasure-seeking life. But God, in His infinite wisdom, decided there was something better for me. As The Message puts it in Titus, “He gave us a good bath, and we came out of it new people, washed inside and out by the Holy Spirit. Our Savior Jesus poured out new life so generously. God’s gift has restored our relationship with him and given us back our lives.”

My prayer is 2011 will bring about the year of Shane following God’s will closer than ever. What remedy are you looking for?

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I used to rely on my own strength to get me through life. When it didn’t work, I’d fall back on my strong family.

Today, God is teaching me that my strength is nothing compared to His power.

I love Paul’s testimony, “When I am weak, then I am strong.” (2 Cor. 12)

It’s really hard for me to acknowledge my own weakness. It’s hard to say “I can’t do life on my own.” I have a difficult time relying on others.

But, yet, when you surrender your life in the palm of God’s hand He makes our weakness perfect in His power.

I’ve been reading “A Shepherd Looks at Psalm 23″ by Keller. He describes the Christian life through his eyes as an actual shepherd.

“Wool in Scripture speaks of the self-life, self-will, self-assertion, self-pride. God has to get below this and do a deep work in our wills to right the wrongs which are often bothering us beneath the surface. So often we put on a fine front and brave, bold exterior when really deep down below there needs to be some remedy applied.”

I don’t know about you, but it’s scary to be vulnerable. When you open yourself up to another you can get deeply hurt. But isn’t this the same place where you can also be deeply loved, deeply forgiven, deeply healed?

The soul work that God has been doing in my life has hurt. But He has exposed some needs that have been hidden due to my personal strength. God is offering me a new way of life. One where every need gets met under His perfect provision. It’s worth losing it all to gain the power of a perfect God.

This song is a favorite at our church: Stronger

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On my last post I wrote about a book called “A Shepherd Looks at Psalm 23″ by Keller. This paragraph struck me the most:

“Wool in Scripture speaks of the self-life, self-will, self-assertion, self-pride. God has to get below this and do a deep work in our wills to right the wrongs which are often bothering us beneath the surface. So often we put on a fine front and brave, bold exterior when really deep down below there needs to be some remedy applied.”

Last time we looked at the first phrase. Today we’ll tackle the second.

• God has to get below this [wool of self-life, self-will, self-assertion, self-pride] and do a deep work in our wills…
• right the wrongs which are often bothering us beneath the surface
• …we put on a fine front and brave, bold exterior
• when really deep down below there needs to be some remedy applied

I find it interesting that the author attributes the job of righting our personal wrongs to God. Shouldn’t it be the sinner that takes care of his own sin?

Keller says, “He [God] will get below the surface, behind the front of our old self-life and expose the things that need to be made right.”

How many of us put up a good face just to make it through the day? How many masks do you wear within a given week? Do you ever let anyone in to see the hurt, the soul pain, and allow the tears to flow?

God knows we aren’t so good at being real on our own. So here in Psalm 23 He uses the example of a kind shepherd taking his rod and opening the fleece of each sheep. Keller says “he [the shepherd] runs his skillful hands over the body; he feels for any sign of trouble; he examines the sheep with care to see that all is well.”

Psalm 139 says:

Search me, God, and know my heart;
   test me and know my anxious thoughts.
See if there is any offensive way in me,
   and lead me in the way everlasting.

When was the last time you allowed time for God to search your heart? Sitting in a quiet chair for just a few moments might be on your to-do list today. Instead of talking to God, be quiet, be still, and listen.

Need some encouragement? Listen to “Know My Heart” by Sara Groves

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1 Peter 2:25 “For you were like sheep going astray, but now you have returned to the Shepherd and Overseer of your souls.”

Psalm 23:4b “your rod and your staff, they comfort me”

A friend of mine gave me the book “A Shepherd Looks at Psalm 23″ by W. Phillip Keller a few months ago. She wrote a sweet inscription inside the cover of the book: “Shane, we are stubborn, stupid and full of sin. But we are His – He won’t leave us this way! So thankful to be in a flock with you!”

At this point in my life I can’t imagine being in a flock where people do not know my stubborn ways, or where they might be scared to called me stupid, where they would be offended to hear that this little lamb, the pastor’s wife, is steeped in sin. If I can’t live in real community, then I can’t live the life God has called me to. So I thank the community of Saint Paul Mount Prospect, IL for accepting me where ever I am along this path. And I pray that I lead my ministry in the same warm, welcoming environment.

While reading a chapter this evening I came across a paragraph that made me stop and pause. After I read and re-read I tried to move on. But God asked me to stop and ponder. After a few quiet moments I kept reading but He led me back to this paragraph:

“Wool in Scripture speaks of the self-life, self-will, self-assertion, self-pride. God has to get below this and do a deep work in our wills to right the wrongs which are often bothering us beneath the surface. So often we put on a fine front and brave, bold exterior when really deep down below there needs to be some remedy applied.”

When I first read this paragraph I laughed and wished there was an entire book just on this small section. Then God gave me an opportunity to return to my blog to do just that! Today, let’s tackle the first phrase.

• God has to get below this [wool of self-life, self-will, self-assertion, self-pride] and do a deep work in our wills…
• right the wrongs which are often bothering us beneath the surface
• …we put on a fine front and brave, bold exterior
• when really deep down below there needs to be some remedy applied

This summer God began working in my life to make me aware of the wool-filled soul I was carrying around. I felt like I had given of myself to so many people and it was my turn to receive. (self-life) I had sacrificed enough of my life for the things I so desired – like longing to live near family. (self-will) Depression had taken away the baby years, the toddler years and I was fighting hard not to allow depression to take away watching my children grow in their elementary years. (self-assertion) I felt I sacrificed my own personal life for my preacher-hubby’s profession and for raising our children maybe it was my turn for something special. (self-pride)

Having a soul filled with bitterness, hurt, pride and anger was just the foothold the devil needed. I wish I could say I escaped His tactics. But the truth is I ran away with him, enjoying every moment.

What the enemy hoped to use for evil in my life God is now redeeming.

God is helping me see my desires and turn them into greater dreams which fit perfectly in His Kingdom.

The phrase from Keller’s book written above “deep work in our wills” is a fresh phrase for me today. Although my recent wrestling with God happened over the last several months, just these past weeks has He been working on my will. At times it feels like He is the surgeon, gently sectioning out pieces of my soul that don’t belong or are no longer needed. It hurts. But the healing is giving way to a renewed living with Christ. A place where I need Him more and see less of me.

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I’m hearing the call to unplug and give writing a rest for a while. So my psalm today is 46:10.

Praying that you keep in touch through your comments, facebook or email!

with love,

Shane

 1 To you, O LORD, I lift up my soul;
 2 in you I trust, O my God.
       Do not let me be put to shame,
       nor let my enemies triumph over me.

 3 No one whose hope is in you
       will ever be put to shame,
       but they will be put to shame
       who are treacherous without excuse.

 4 Show me your ways, O LORD,
       teach me your paths;

 5 guide me in your truth and teach me,
       for you are God my Savior,
       and my hope is in you all day long.

 6 Remember, O LORD, your great mercy and love,
       for they are from of old.

 7 Remember not the sins of my youth
       and my rebellious ways;
       according to your love remember me,
       for you are good, O LORD.

 8 Good and upright is the LORD;
       therefore he instructs sinners in his ways.

 9 He guides the humble in what is right
       and teaches them his way.

 10 All the ways of the LORD are loving and faithful
       for those who keep the demands of his covenant.

 11 For the sake of your name, O LORD,
       forgive my iniquity, though it is great.

 12 Who, then, is the man that fears the LORD ?
       He will instruct him in the way chosen for him.

 13 He will spend his days in prosperity,
       and his descendants will inherit the land.

 14 The LORD confides in those who fear him;
       he makes his covenant known to them.

 15 My eyes are ever on the LORD,
       for only he will release my feet from the snare.

 16 Turn to me and be gracious to me,
       for I am lonely and afflicted.

 17 The troubles of my heart have multiplied;
       free me from my anguish.

 18 Look upon my affliction and my distress
       and take away all my sins.

 19 See how my enemies have increased
       and how fiercely they hate me!

 20 Guard my life and rescue me;
       let me not be put to shame,
       for I take refuge in you.

 21 May integrity and uprightness protect me,
       because my hope is in you.

 22 Redeem Israel, O God,
       from all their troubles!

Of all these beautiful verses, which one will you meditate on today?

I’m putting verse 15 in my back pocket today:

My eyes are ever on the LORD, for only he will release my feet from the snare.

He alone is my rock and my salvation;
he is my fortress, I will not be shaken.

My salvation and my honor depend on God;
he is my mighty rock, my refuge.

Trust in him at all times, O people;
pour out your hearts to him,
for God is our refuge. Ps 62

I love the visual of God as my rock. But, have you ever thought of rocks as restful? I can’t seem to get this out of my mind!

I need to rest on the Rock

• in order not to slip into depression
• to battle my obsessive thoughts on weight control
• for control over my schedule or lack of schedule
• to create order in my home

Some days I feel so out of control I don’t know where to begin. So I spend the day in a daze ignoring life, ignoring chores, ignoring relationships.

This month I’d love to focus on the psalms for What’s on Your Mind. No rules, no regulations. Just a month of lovin’ on the psalms! You in? Join in at anytime.

(Just as a reminder, I have scaled back my writing. I hope to have good content but not daily posts. At the beginning of 2010 I pray I will have more consistency. But, this is all I have for now. Thanks for your patience.)

it does!

He alone is my rock and my salvation;
he is my fortress, I will never be shaken. Ps 62:2

Join in on the fun. Link up with your picture!

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While deleting several buckets of emails today I was reminded of all the useless garbage we hear within our day.

• the “need” to be skinnier
• the drive to be the best at all you do
• the desire for more material items

While watching Home Makeover last night my daughter said “I want a new house for Christmas!” Somehow this girl is missing the whole point of the show. Is our house old? YES! In need of a makeover? YES! Are we in a dire situation like the folks featured on the show? NO!

As I’m typing this I see her “Santa Claws” list (yes, that’s how she spelled it!) for the numerous new WebKinz that she’s hoping to obtain this Christmas. Our children are growing up in a “me” centered “more” world and we’re on the front lines battling for their souls!

But quite honestly, she’s not the only one in this house with a wish list. You should hear my thought patterns. Lately, they are very focused on my pant size. I’ve spent so much time in the library trying to find the new trick to change my diet plan. In front of me are my workout plans for the week and the daytimer holding me accountable.

That’s why I want a SPAM filter for my heart. Church on Sunday isn’t going to cut it. I need to surround myself with Christ’s truth lest the junk mail win the day.

Just now I added an agenda item to my calendar – Devotion.  I know if I don’t put it in it will never happen. I’m not a morning person. So when I get up – I just go. But I can become an afternoon person! It’s my only “quiet” time throughout the day. I pray that God will bless that time richly so that I will desire to come back for more throughout the days this week.

Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things. Philippians 4:8

Call it a heavenly SPAM alert!

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• God promises to respond to our prayers – Ps 34:17
• God promises to reveal things that we do not know through prayer – Jer 33:3
• God promises to do good in our lives – Matt 7:11
• God promises to help us in our prayers - Romans 8:26
• God promises to offer peace through prayer and thanksgiving – Phil 4:6-7 

Take a look at these passages and comment on which promise in prayer God is working out in your life.

If you have posted about prayer, let us know and link up!  Those of you reading the comments, please take a look at the other bloggers too when you get a chance!

Blessings in prayer this Tuesday!