Joys in the Journey
During my last several quiet months of non-blogging I’ve enjoyed reading blogs by other pastor’s wives. One blog I connect with and am challenged by is called Painting in Words. Shannon writes a particular thread called 100 ways depression had made my life better. Although I prefer to complain about my depression, I do believe that this is an area in my life that God continues to redeem. Here’s my latest example.
This afternoon I led my first bible study at my new church. It’s bittersweet for me. The ladies I left in Chicago are so special to me. Bible study was where I gave and received real life. I miss them, but am trying to move where God is leading me.
At our new church I’m enjoying meeting people and learning to share life together. All the women in the group this afternoon are part of MOPS (mothers of preschoolers) at our church. We were talking about the program and how I’m looking forward to spending time with them… when I let it “slip” that life for me during that time in my life was not so happy.
After I shared my struggle a couple of ladies continued to ask me many, many questions. Now, I have no problem talking about depression, but I felt like I was giving TMI, especially for the first meeting! In my insecure head, I figured they were asking me questions because they wanted the “dirt” on the new pastor’s wife! But, God had other plans!
At the end of our meeting we prayed and said our goodbyes. One girl was hanging around and clearly wanted to talk. She thanked me for being open about my depression. Her own son was recently diagnosed with depression and just started on prozac. Can you even imagine? Here I was thinking I was the target of investigation when she was just searching for clues into what’s happening inside her son. Apparently by sharing my story I was able to give her a sense of peace and hope.
What an awesome opportunity! God is so good, so amazing. I am so thankful to be walking this path with Him. Just wish I could get over myself and get out of His way!!!
In you, Lord my God, I put my trust. I trust in you; do not let me be put to shame, nor let my enemies triumph over me. No one who hopes in you will ever be put to shame… Show me your ways, Lord, teach me your paths. Guide me in your truth and teach me, for you are God my Savior, and my hope is in you all day long. Remember, Lord, your great mercy and love, for they are from of old. Do not remember the sins of my youth and my rebellious ways; according to your love remember me, for you, Lord, are good. Ps 25:1-7
Posted on October 3, 2012, in depression, transition and tagged bible study, depression, diagnosis, MOPS, pastor's wife. Bookmark the permalink. 5 Comments.
I have often found that in talking about my own depression, someone else has found knowledge, freedom, empathy and more that I had no idea they needed. I’m glad you’ve found my series so inspiring (the last month got away from me and I realized I hadn’t worked on it all of September! That fog catches me sometimes in the worst ways). I’m even more glad that you had the courage to share your struggles. I think the body of Christ needs to see more of us that way – broken yet redeemed with hope that one day we will be made whole.
So true Shannon! We are so broken yet redeemed! Love that thought! Thanks!
Bless you for being so transparent Shane. You never know you will be lifted up. Love to you!
Sending you hugs carol!
When we moved here 2 1/2 years ago, I had a hard time fitting in with our new congregation. Like you, I had to adjust to a new Bible study group (much smaller and far less conversation, etc.). In addition, I took on the role as the kids’ SS teacher (mostly my two kids). It was hard to make the adjustment . . . such a departure from what I was used to. In many ways I’m still making it. For a while, it seemed as if no one really wanted to get to know me or my family. Slowly, we’re making headway.
I know that God will use you as you open up your heart and life to others. We never know who is waiting on the other side of the door–that one or two people who need the witness of our stories and ministry therein. Shane, I’ll be praying for you that God will give you the strength, wisdom, and confidence you need to give your life to others. Nothing about this is easy, but God has promised us his presence and divine cooperation along the way and as we go. Never forget his great love for you!
peace~elaine